I’m the dumbest person ever for moving in with my boyfriend and his mom. Never make my mistake.

Ugh. This is just a mess. I just need to vent to humans about it but I’m so embarrassed to still be involved in this. Too much of a mess to explain why I’m stuck (for now) but need someone to just tell me I’m not crazy and she’s weird.

My boyfriend is an only child to a single mom. She can’t do anything for herself at all. For example, her car broke down while he was 5 hours away camping with buddies. She blew up my phone trying to get me to call him, I was like “there’s nothing he can do even if he answers”. She was so angry the whole time that he didnt immediately come back to rescue her. She even tried to get me to use my family’s triple A to tow her. Random other thing, we live with her at the moment (HUGE mistake I know I’m the stupidest most idiotic dumbo alive but she’s trapped me financially and I can’t risk an eviction on my record when I’ve literally never even rented before) and the well broke. She has horrible credit and inherited the house from her dad, so she tried getting ME to take out a loan and threatened to kick me out (winter in MN) when I said no.

Recently, my little sister got leukemia. Literally over last Christmas. My boyfriend and I went up to see her for a while before she started chemo because this was the last time I’d be able to give her hugs and hangout without social distancing and masks for the next 2 years while she does treatment. His mom got the flu and was calling him telling him she needs him to come home because “she fell on the floor and couldn’t get up for an hour”. Threatened to kick me out and put all my stuff outside because “she should be with her family”, as if my parents need their oldest moving BACK in while their youngest has FUCKING CANCER.

The last couple straws were small but telling. It’s when I officially made my decision to leave my boyfriend behind if he’s not gonna make effort to get us out of this house. It’s been 7 months of hell with her manipulation and abuse, financially trapping us by “I can’t afford electricity this month, so if you don’t pay the full $700 bill, we just won’t have electricity!” On top of making us pay her rent. No rent should be involved but she’s the homeowner. The original agreement was for us to have an apartment in the house (4 story house with 2 separate spaces to live, multi-family home type thing) but she’s become very enmeshed. She constantly invades our space only to yell at us that “we’re so boring and never give her attention”. One thing I forgot to mention, she hasn’t had a job since October!

Anyways, the two things. First, I bought a really nice ice cream from a local creamery in my hometown and brought it home. It was $10 for a pint. She ate it! Her excuse is “you can’t leave anything sweet around me because it’s not my fault that I can’t control myself!”. I asked her to please pay me back because it was expensive and I can’t get it til I go back home. She literally screamed at me like SCREAMED bloody murder “THIS IS MY HOUSE! THIS IS MY FREEZER! ANYTHING IN THIS HOUSE IS MINE! IF YOU DONT LIKE IT THEN GET THE F*CK OUT!” Meanwhile, I’m deaf (HoH technically but meet legal threshold for deaf and cannot hear people unless they are facing me and I can lip read) and she still left my ears ringing!

The second last straw was with his cat. She was being a bit needy and just really wanted my boyfriend to pet her, which is pretty normal. His mom saw this and said “just another bitch that wants your attention”. She immediately corrected to “I mean woman” when we were like “WOAH!” but the intention was still there. She essentially told me “my son’s attention is a resource that I am entitled to and any threat to that is a bitch and any other woman fits that category”.

Other weird things I just need to vent about: she constantly asks him to buy her favorite cologne (he does not wear cologne at all), she calls him by her fathers name whenever he does something helpful or for her, and she refuses to do anything for herself or try (needs help with anything over 5 pounds, can’t take care of the house or her car, anytime she talks to someone about her finances or repairs he has to be there to take notes and help her understand, etc).

I’m just done! He’s truly a great person like boyfriend-wise, he’s so kind and patient and loving, but his mom just ruins it for me. Can’t do it. Especially since his grandpa wanted him to get half the inheritance from selling the house, but died before he put it in the will, so he has to play this game with his mom of waiting to get money or get the house, and I’m just not playing anymore.