A shitty day in the life

I live with a chronic illness. It’s invisible, so I look fine, which means people assume I am. In reality, every day right now takes effort just to get through.

I have an upcoming surgery. It’s medically necessary, long overdue, and it comes with a $5k cost.

I was inspired by seeing other Dommes share real, unfiltered days in their lives, and today felt like one worth sharing.

What tipped me over today was giving a recovery update to my team leader and realising I wasn’t being taken seriously. Having expectations placed on me that don’t reflect the reality of surgery, recovery, or chronic pain, being spoken to as though two weeks post-op should be enough. It won’t be.

Having to repeatedly justify your pain, your limits, and your recovery timeline at work is draining. Managing a demanding job while advocating for your own health wears you down.

**I’m still a Domme.**

Still grounded.

Just leading from a more human place today.

To fellow Dommes — strength doesn’t always look polished or effortless.

To attentive, emotionally intelligent subs — real support shows up quietly and consistently.

I’ve updated my Throne with multiple support options for those who wish to contribute toward my surgery — not out of pity, but out of care, respect, and presence.

I’m not asking for charity, just having a vent and sharing this with a community I genuinely love and value.

Sometimes even dominant women need support.