It’s been 5 years since I last spoke to my sister, and I still feel guilty.

It’s been 5 years since I last talked to my sister and some days the guilt hits harder. We had a huge fight and just stopped speaking, and honestly I don’t even know if she wants to hear from me now. I keep thinking about all the little moments we missed, birthdays, holidays, random calls we’ll never make. Part of me wants to reach out, but I’m scared it’ll just reopen old wounds. Does anyone else deal with this kind of constant guilt? How do you even start to let go or make peace with it? I just want to feel like maybe it’s okay to move forward without feeling like I’m betraying her or myself.