I'm confused

I ended things with my boyfriend a few months ago because i felt lost and thought i needed time to figure myself out. Back then it felt right but now that he’s gone everything feels way quieter and heavier. We still talk sometimes and it just confuses me more because i miss what we had but i don't know if going back would actually fix things or just replay the same issues. I keep wondering if i messed up for real or if this is just regret catching up late.