Should I tell my ex-therapist the truth?
I recently canceled all future sessions I had scheduled with my therapist. I saw her every other week for about 3 months. Probably 7-8 sessions in total.
I knew pretty early that we may not vibe. I tried pushing through this feeling, but it was getting difficult because she kept guilting me during sessions. She’d say stuff like “I’m afraid what I’m about to say will result in me getting an email saying you canceled all future appointments”. She would tell me about other clients she had that would just disappear on her. She’d end every session telling me that she was really happy I was her client, and that she hoped she’d still see me next week.
So, with each session I had with her, I felt more and more guilt because I was always subconsciously thinking she was not right for me, and because she kept acknowledging that she was worried I would ghost her. She was always pushing for me to see her every single week rather than every other week. I would sometimes tell her a detail about my life or something, and her response would be like “and you think only every other week is enough for sessions?”
She was also convinced that I was an addict, when I don’t really drink and I just smoke weed occasionally. She specializes in AA stuff, but I didn’t know that until our first session when she told me. She seemed convinced that I picked her as a therapist because I had some underlying, deep-rooted addiction issues and would always tell me “clients are sent to me for a reason, we’re going to find out your reason”. Idk, it always felt a little strange. But these are all reasons I canceled with her!
Now, since I canceled all future appointments, she’s texted me on my private number a few times asking me if I still want to see her. When I canceled the appointments online, I put a reason for it and said “I am seeking in-person therapy instead”. And I wrote this in the hopes that she would see my reasoning and understand, but she’s reached out to me via text multiple times.
I have ignored them, and do not want to reply, but I still feel the gnaw of guilt and feel like I may owe her some kind of explanation? But I know whatever I say won’t be truthful because I don’t want to hurt her feelings, obviously. So is it even worth responding at all?? It’s kind of eating at me, though. Not sure if it’ll even make me feel better.
This whole situation with her has made me feel a lot more crazy than I did before I started seeking therapy lol. Any advice is welcomed!! I would appreciate a therapist’s POV as well. I’m not sure if my unease about her is unfounded and derived from my own issues, or if there’s something tangible there.
Posted Feb 7, 2026, 10:59 PM UTC