I’m not sure if I was being dramatic or not, he could get in serious trouble.

So I’m unsure if I being dramatic or over defensive from the use of the R-slur, that another person in my class used to describe himself.

I’ll refer to him as, T. We’re both in college taking a course for just 18+ people, and have been partnered up for a presentation. I’m 19 but I’m unsure of his age but I speculate he’s in his 20s.

Me and T were texting about the assignment we have due in a couple of days, and he began referring to himself by the R-slur. I said to him I wasn’t comfortable with him using that word around me and to not use it.

I generally don’t care what people call themselves in private or with friends but this is the one of the few times I had ever talked to T, and I had already been uncomfortable talking to him in the past.

He started arguing his case and said he felt he was ‘different from other people’, or in his words. “Normal people don’t understand my mind.” As reason why he uses that word to ‘describe’ himself.

He stated that felt that he could be autistic, which isn’t an issue. But when I had asked if he had a diagnosis or ever sought out for one, he continued arguing he didn’t need one and that it was ‘irrelevant’.

I told him multiple times to drop the arguing and to stop using the word around me, as I just wanted to assignment done. Which he continued to talk about his personal life with the R-slur, to try validate the reason he was using it. His excuse being ‘hundreds of people have called him the R-slur’, so he felt okay using it.

I replied saying, “that’s his experience and for him to deal with/ work through”, but I don’t know him and he doesn’t know me or my feelings around that word. I said, I didn’t care for his experience, especially when he recognises it’s used in a demeaning way against him.

We continued back and forth until I had enough and told him I would update our teacher about the situation, as I didn’t feel comfortable doing the assignment with him anymore. He then said he didn’t do anything wrong and that I would be ‘in deeper issues’ with the situation than I would be.

Unsure what he meant by that but anyways.

I’ve messaged our teacher and stopped replying to him, but I feel like I’m being dramatic of the situation or he’s just made me feel that way. I’m still not sure, if I’m in the right to bring our school into the mix of the issue. any advice?

I do have screenshots, if that could give any clarity to the situation I’m in