Divorce — custody disagreement what’s best for cats

My 34M and my spouse 34F (together 20 years married 5) and I are in the process of divorcing and are trying to keep things amicable. We agreed on everything else and the only point of contention is our two cats.

One cat is a senior (13F) that we’ve had since she was a kitten together. The other is a younger cat (7MOF) that was rescued as a week-old kitten through my friend whose litter had been killed by another cat. I made the decision to take her in, bottle-fed her, and kept her alive overnights during the neonatal stage. Since then, both of us have shared caregiving responsibilities.

We’re separating households. I’ll be moving into a one-bedroom apartment and she’ll be living in a large house with her parents, grandparents, and their 3 cats.

In terms of the cats’ relationship with each other: they coexist well, but they don’t appear to be a strongly bonded pair. The younger cat tends to follow the older one around, which seems typical given the age difference, but they rarely play and groom each other and it’s rare to see them sleep close together. There’s no obvious distress when they’re separated for short periods.

I feel the fairest solution is one cat each: I take the younger cat I originally took in, and she takes the older cat. She believes it’s best for both cats to stay together in one home and that they should live with her, with me visiting.

We’re both capable of caring for them and both genuinely love them. We disagree on whether “best for the cats” means keeping them together in one household or splitting them so each person keeps one.

I’m intentionally trying to present this as neutrally as possible because I’m looking for perspectives on fairness and animal welfare, not validation.

For people who’ve been through divorce or pet custody disputes: what tends to be the most reasonable or humane solution in situations like this?

TL;DR:

Divorcing couple with two cats: a 13-year-old senior we raised together and a 7-month-old rescue kitten I took in and bottle-fed from a week old. Care has been shared. We’re separating homes (me to a 1-bedroom apartment, her to a large multi-cat household). The cats coexist but don’t seem strongly bonded. I think the fairest solution is one cat each; she thinks both cats should stay together with her and I visit. Looking for perspectives on what’s most reasonable and humane.