Anyone else feel like following through with exposure therapy only makes their SA more intense?

I try to forcing myself out there as often as I can, but especially recently I feel like every attempt has left me getting shut down, misunderstood and being infantilized by those around me.

For example, I was recently apart of a social support group (not necessarily for anxiety - but it was mental health focused), where they were encouraging everyone to speak up. After sitting there for over an hour with my throat being physically closed shut I found a good opportunity to add to the conversation. I felt I was calm enough and had a rough outline of what I wanted to say, however my brain still managed to shut down mid-sentence. I can usually slow down and remain calm enough to finish my train of thought, but even when I do they still wind up becoming increasingly incoherent. It was bad enough this time that the counselor had to step in stop me from spiraling further, which was followed by several of the members attempting to validate what they thought I was trying to say to save the vibe. I wasn't going to correct them, and honestly I've had far serious panic attacks trying to speak up before with less understanding groups of people so it wasn't as bad as it could've been.

Almost every attempt at socializing leaves me humiliated, in a state of self loathing and just reinforces the internal belief that if I speak up something bad will happen. Which in turn makes my SA worse.

I even had a friend who forced me to use voice-chat with them/a friend group of theirs, which I did almost daily for almost 3 years. I am just as awkward and quiet with them as I was day one, and now that I haven't done it in a while I'm back to feeling like I'll have a panic attack just from joining a call with anyone.

The group therapy incident honestly has me feeling like an outlier among outliers. Even the quieter people there were able to coherently articulate their thoughts when prompted...and here I am needing saving from multiple people. One of them felt so bad they gave me their contact details if I should want to talk or vent about anything - which was super sweet of them but...lol