does it count? (sex w/stepdad)

I was a legal adult when this happened, so idk if this even counts as SA. I was really drunk, to the point of not being able to walk. I was vomiting and couldn't keep anything down. I was grieving a close family member and it was the only way I knew how to cope. I shouldn't have gotten that drunk around him though, I know that. My memories are all messed up. He was on top of me, my underwear pushed to the side. He was choking me. I couldn't breathe or move. I felt him do it. I felt him penetrate me. After that it's all blurry. I dissociated and eventually passed out and when I woke up, my stepdad was gone. He left the house. I can't remember until weeks later. Now when I get scared or think of him, I get aroused. I think of guys having sex with me like how he did. It feels awful to admit. I'm not sexually attracted to him. I never wanted it to happen. I wake up screaming from nightmares about what happened. I was 18 though, so does it even count?