Help me make the right choices here!

I already know that it’s my insecurity holding me back, but I (24F) am/was seeing a 28M. He lives in the suburbs with his parents while I live in the city. I just moved here in August 2025 and I’m planning to get my PhD soon (applying in August). I have my master’s degree. I play some instruments, paint, read, work out a lot, and have a solid group of friends I’ve made since moving here.

Now I know this guy is a bit of a dud. Games as his only hobby, has a very immature friend group that says some very racist stuff (he himself doesn’t but doesn’t really stop it), and he sent me a text convo of his friends photoshopping each other into photos next to Epstein. I called it off after the photos but he told me he’d work on calling out his friends and making new ones. I don’t really know if I believe it.

On top of that I got a job offer in my home city. It’s from a former coworker/mentor. He wants me to start part-time now and then move to his city and start working full-time when I can get out of my lease. I’m leaning towards doing it, as it’s a big city with lots to do and huge opportunities for my field. I could also probably do my PhD there, as there are many schools and one would likely take me. My family also lives there, so it would be nice to be around for them.

I know I need to fully break up with this guy, but he’s nice and sweet and says all the right things. We have fun together and since he never goes out, I get to show him lots of new things and I enjoy it a lot. I know I can do better than him (or just stay single) as I have this big, beautiful life ahead of me, but I don’t know if I should just end things now or wait it out. The offer isn’t technically in my hand yet but I’m negotiating on Friday. Someone please motivate me to make the choice I already know I need to make.