Distance during recovery
Hi, looking for similar experiences as I have no clue what to expect.
My Q is sober and is actively working on staying sober. He's going to therapy and attending AA, and is going through all the steps and taking it very seriously. I am so happy to see him like this, he is quite obviously in a better head space.
However, ever since he did step 4 (making inventory of himself) he has changed a bit. He seems distant and not nearly as affectionate as he used to be. I mentioned this to him and he said he could see what I meant. He looked into it and apparently it's common for people in recovery to go through a stage of being disconnected from loved ones as they try to cope with their emotions without alcohol.
He is not mean or anything but I feel bad admitting that I resent this distance as I have been nothing but supportive. I know his sobriety and struggle is not about me. But I don't think I'm handling it well.
Please share, have you had this in your relationship with your Q and did it ever change or is this my new normal?
Posted Feb 11, 2026, 10:19 PM UTC