32 [M4F] looking for genuine connection despite neurodivergent

Hello from Singapore 32 Chinese, born with a parents divorced since I was a kids since then just after 1-3 years I wasn't loved and grow up with normal care and love. First with hobby, I like to watch anime, gaming, drawing, watch movie at cinema, sometime at home, recently watch kdrama, English, Chinese drama, chimes anime as well. Also once tried paper quiling and pottery. Hope to find someone who can click and laugh together, and also spend time exploring this thing love, in simple form even if life isn't perfect or glamourous.

I do not have the same understanding, experience and knowledge of love as everyone else. Sometime I'm wondering if my parents don't even love me so I expect to be love today?

Since I have no love since birth, and also have depression (dhysthimia) and ADHD, most people will shun, as mental health and neurodivergent is a stigma. Some people will used people who are handicap without legs or hand to make me feel worse or to thin my life isn't worth as much. Sometime I gave up love, In a way I know I won't be love anymore but hopefully as my remaining days tilll someday, maybe I will get to experience love again, for someone I am, even if I'm not perfect, as relationship and love today feels like transactional and business partnership feels.