At a loss, daily accidents after potty training 4 months ago

Please help, I’m at my wits end. We started potty training my 3.5 year old last October. Started with the oh crap method. He caught onto peeing pretty fast, and had a few successful poops after a few days too.

But 4 months later and we still have daily accidents. I don’t know where the disconnect is. He knows that pee and poop go in the potty. He will often announce he has to go potty and will pee on his own or with some help getting his pants/undies down. Most times he catches himself after a tiny dribble, stops, and then goes pee in the little potty…but then other times will full on fire hose release in his pants and leave a huge puddle on the floor.

He seems to prefer the little floor potty but when we are upstairs there is only a regular toilet with a toddler seat, so he does know how to use both.

He has a “tell” for pee- tippy toes, so we usually can prompt or make him go pee when we see that.

Poop is another story. He will say he has to go potty and run to the bathroom, but only after he already has poop in his undies. No “tell” for poop. He almost always poops his undies at daycare.

We still use overnight diapers for bedtime and pull ups for naps (he rarely naps at home now) as well as pull ups for longer car rides and outings where I don’t know how long we will be away from a bathroom. Could that be what I’m doing wrong?? Daycare also puts him in pull ups for naps, and if he has two accidents they change him from undies to pull ups with is probably half the time. I have spoken to them recently that I need more support/communication about potty training but that was only just last week bc they got some new teachers so we will see if that helps.

I had a baby two weeks ago so I am not able to rush to his aid when he has to go. I was really hoping for him to be potty trained before the baby came. Add in the other stressors of a new baby and hormones and you can imagine my frustration. Crying every day. I don’t consider this a “regression” because this is just how it’s been for the last four months. If it was just from the changes with a new baby, I don’t think I’d be so upset as I expected a regression at this time but like I said… this is just how it is every day.

What am I missing?! How can I figure out/help him realize when he has to poop? How do I get him to be consistent with pee? We give him m&ms for a reward, lots of praise, and have offered toys if he poops in the potty but that hasn’t happened yet.

Help me Reddit, I’m losing it over here :(