I fell in love with my friend with benefits of four years and I am lost

I am a 43 (F) and met a 41(M) on a dating app over four years ago. In the beginning it seemed to me that we were heading into a relationship, however it didn’t work out that way. After taking a bit of time apart we both felt that we wewere such good friends and had a great physical connection we hecame FWB’s. He has also become my best friend and is very important to me for a variety of reasons. We both have respect for each other, have an amazing friendship, and love each other as friends.

This is why it’s sticky however. I am very much in love with him and I want a relationship with him. The issue is I don't want to lose the friendship part if I tell him and it's not reciprocal. I am having a hard time because it's becoming harder to not tell him what I want and how I feel.

I think he feels the same ( he confessed over the summer that he was in love me and has been for years when we were out one night. This made me unbelievably happy and I said I feel the same. Fast forward to a couple months later after he avoided me or being alone with me, I brought this up and he said he didn't remember and of course he loves me but isn't in love with me. I call BS and we had a bit of an argument.

He is extremely jaded from his ex wife and fears being hurt or broken up with , so he’s going with the thought that if I’m his friend I cant leave him. I want to tell him how I feel every time I see him but I just can’t do it. With that being said life is short and I can’t continue the benefits part of this if he doesn’t feel the same. Has anyone had a similar situation? What did you do? Any advice or suggestions would be great.