I feel like a partner would help me a lot with my healing journey and family situation

I'm 25F. Never been in a relationship before or even on a date. I'm actually quite stable. I earn good, i have a good degree and I think I matured emotionally and mentally. But I want to move out from home. I don't want to be a money bank for my family and I want to enjoy life. I want to travel with a partner and do relationship-stuff. I'm already very independent, so I don't need any support or help bc I'm used to doing everything alone. but I wish I had some distraction or someone to look forward to meet and talk to and of course everything that has to do with love..just my own partner. Travel together, have some good sarcastic laughs together, like the basics. A friend of mine is much younger than me and even got engaged and her partner took her out to a very beautiful date, I went to the gym lol.

Yes I tried the apps but didn't like them at all bc I need an emotional connection and I have a hard time dealing with the digital aspect of the apps. All my friends meet their bfs at church but I don't like my church bc youth group is their toxic. I myself don't know how my friend met her partner when she herself doesn't go to the youth group but apparently still God made the impossible possible lol. However in my case I'm not kidding or being dramatic but I have this lingering feeling that I will never meet someone lol or it will be one-sided, he likes me but I don't like him or the opposite. The only thing I had btw was an online situationship thing with a very toxic guy. he treatd me like shit but I must say he gave me many compliments and only through him I realized that I actually have something to offer as a partner. Idk tho if I will find someone who wouldn't mind my apron belly or some loose skin on my arms from weightloss tho lol

My question is: what do I do know? I tried the apps and tbh I wait till I get approached but its not working. No time for additional hobbies (I already hit the gym.