Political activism and severe disability: venting but also seeking thoughts

I feel like by simply being homebound and non-negotiably reliant on having caregivers, political activism ends up completely inaccessible to me.

My political views are not in question, I fully believe in that which I think is right. My autism has definitely shaped my political beliefs too, especially in regards to being anti-hierarchy.

What I struggle with is the feeling that I am forced to rely on others for any change to happen. I have all these thoughts and feelings of what should be done, what *has* to be done, yet with no power to act on it. It’s like I have to wait for others to do it instead, because of the discrepancy in ability.

That in itself makes me feel disempowered too because I cannot act upon the beliefs I have.

Metaphorically speaking, it’s like being seen as being all bark and no bite, with no consideration for you having been born without teeth. That my voice somehow stands in opposition to the movement by virtue of me not having the means to physically participate, even if we believe in the same things.

Even disability focused activism often don’t include people like us it feels like. The focus is always on what you can do and provide, but for those of us who cannot be independent? Who needs support to do even minor things? Where do we end up in the fight? Where do those of us who are ”useless” and possibly not able contribute fit in?

I don’t really blame people who are fighting for this either. I understand that my needs are too extensive for me to be able to participate in most things.

But I wish they would at least be aware that people like us exist. That we don’t just do nothing because we’re ”lazy”. I understand the labour needed in giving directions to others, but I wish we could be more than afterthoughts nonetheless. I wish to feel like more than a spectator, but above all else I wish to feel like more than an obstacle to a better future.

I have my writing, but not enough mental or physical capacity to sustain it on a regular basis. I try my best to stay informed as well as inform others, and to educate where I am able. I donate directly to people who are in need where I am able. I don’t feel like any of this is enough, nor do I want it to be the only things I can do, but I also know that if I aim higher with my disabilities I will achieve nothing.

Is anyone else here in a similar boat? How do you navigate being politically radical with little to no means of joining others in any forms of ideological contexts? Is it possible to be a hermit against your will yet still engaged in doing actual good for one’s cause? Is community and mutual aid networks even possible for people like us?