Pitching the first Palace in an OC-heavy Persona 5 Sequel I’m writing

I’m trying to finish writing what I think amounts to a legacy sequel to Persona 5, with a new group of teens discovering the Metaverse and, after linking it to the Phantom Thieves, continue on their legacy. I also kind of want to set it in America, as I think that’d be an interesting angle to take the story, but it can still be reworked to be set in Japan or any other place in the future.

The first Palace ruler is the principal of the new school the Wildcard Protagonist goes to, and his sin is Vanity. His claim to fame is that he turned the school from an underperforming, violent dump into an actually semi-respected institution with higher than average test scores. However, beyond the surface, he rules with an iron fist. He got the school like that basically by purging it of all the ‘negative influences,’ mostly rule breakers and/or minorities he deems as unfit for the school (he himself is white). He also forces troublemakers he deems useful enough to become snitches for him, which allows him to broaden his reach around the school at all times and also make the students to divided to do anything. Basically, it’s my take on the ‘easily hatable first boss’ I’ve noticed in similar OC P5 stories.

Now to the party members. First, the protagonist. In my mind, he’s an African-American teen with a strong of justice, who apart from having the standard JRPG protagonist personality, is basically the perfect foil to the First Palace Ruler’s ideals. The second is the Magician Confidant ‘best friend’ archetype. She’s a white girl from a lower-income who was alienated by most of her minority friends after trying to fight back against the Ruler and causing too much trouble because of it. The third character doesn’t really have an archetype (I combined the ‘best friend’ and ‘first girl’ tropes). He’s a Hispanic boy who got forced to become one of the Ruler’s snitches, knowing it’s a bad system but only choosing to act on it after a fight left some of the other snitches in bad condition. There is no ‘mentor’ character; rather, they piece together all the info about Palaces from the Protag’s limited Velvet Room knowledge, the things they know about the past Phantom Thieves, and a bit of dumb luck.

So, that’s the pitch. Is it any good? Are there ways to improve it?