I am Scared of Growing Up

Hi, everyone! I suppose I'm mostly ranting, but I'm also looking for advice :)

I am 20 years old, and am currently in community college. I have been having a weird time since graduating high school two years ago. I worked for a year at a supermarket, and it was... interesting...

Anyway, I've always been super touchy and weird about growing up. I am extremely protective of my hobbies and free time-- a big point of contention when it came to working and doing school at the same time.

Anyway, since I'm so weird and defensive about growing up, I am weird and defensive toward my family sometimes. I can be rude-- my family says that I sound like a brat. It has come to a bit of a breaking point, and my mom has said that I need to move out probably by my birthday (which is in June).

I am extremely frustrated, because I was mostly concerned with my issues OUTSIDE of my family. Things like being really anxious out of the house and obsessive bouts, etc. I feel so self-absorbed and horrible right now.

I am frighteneed because I can't afford to live on my own-- and I was really averse to doing school and work at the same time. I know it's just life. But the all my niceties (i.e. the only thing that make life redeemable) being subdued, makes me DESPAIRED!!

Anyway, I'm wondering if anyone else has dealt with this successfully? I feel over-dramatic because people tell me I'll just adjust... But it's like hmm... Sure, let me adjust my entire personality for a job or something?