Aunts and Uncles pretend we don’t exist. Am I overreacting?

I’m married with 1 child. I also have a brother who is married with 1 child. At events with extended family, we feel like we get ignored. My grandmother is thankfully still with us, but isn’t very mobile (gets around with a cane) so at family holidays, our aunts and uncles stay stationary with her in one room and barely talk to my sister or I (these are my mothers siblings) We are busy chasing our kids around so sitting in 1 spot isn’t an option. We each host a holiday throughout the year, and it’s a crapshoot if the aunts and uncles show up (but our friends aka chosen family always do). One aunt or uncle usually bring my grandmother, and the others who come are usually in a rush to leave.

Of this combo of aunts and uncles, 1 lives within 45 minutes. The rest are 3+ hours away. They all regularly make plans to visit my grandmother together, but my sister and I never get an invite and they never ask to stop by our houses when they are in town anyway.

(For context we do reach out and visit our grandmother often on our own, and our mother sees her multiple times a week since she lives the closest).

Before you jump and say travel and phones work both ways, it’s always us reaching out, and when we do visit, packing up half the house to visit their non child proof homes, where we feel unwelcome (ex: a meal starts at 2 (in the middle of nap time) and we get glared at for fussy kids and it’s clear when the meal is over it’s time go)

So I guess I have 2 questions, am I being ridiculous being annoyed we never get an invite to these gatherings, they never ask to visit and communication/visits is a one way street?

Would it be wrong to stop attending some of these events and starting our own traditions without them?

For more context we both have in-laws who are hours away, and we do travel to them but events are planned around what works for our schedules since we have the youngest kids.

If you’re still reading TY!