Today is hard…

Brothers & sisters, I am struggling spiritually and mentally today. I try to be the best mom I can to my two little boys. I work so hard & barely have time for myself. After the divorce, I solely took on all the bills. It definitely changed me. I try to be frugal. I visit food pantries weekly & still struggle. Today took the cake.

Me & the babies had to walk in the rain to a pantry this morning because I have no gas & it’s only a mile walk. Welp, of course they are closed & will reopen Tuesday because of the holiday tomorrow. I lost it walking back home. I couldn’t stop crying & I felt bad because the babies kept asking me what was wrong. It’s not their fault, I just hate that I am trying my best. I hate that they have to see me so down & broken.

It’s hard surviving in this economy. I barely eat some days. I can’t afford to miss work. I contemplated taking diapers ( I never did , just an intrusive thought) because we are so low. My chest feels like it’s going to explode. Life is truly kicking me down. I need God to heal me .