17f with dissociative dis0rd*rs from CPTSD, AMA

So yeah I have dissociative tendencies, (I had to censor that word bc it’s not allowed apparently) I have created a complete alternative reality with fictional people that I can zone out in for hours. These people are the complete opposite of the way I live in reality and are based in remote places thousands of miles from me. I have created their own friends, hobbies etc. if I listen to music and I accidentally zone out i could go for 3-4 hours and possibly more without being interrupted. This stems from childhood ab*se from my mother until I was 5-13, and her denying it and making me feel crazy which F’d me up more. I started zoning out because I couldn’t stand her around me.