How do you deal with being guilted into things by parents?

I’m 18 and a college freshman. My mom parentified me for 3 years after her divorce and after doing some research I found our relationship was emotional incest.

My mom still hasn’t visited me at college. I really don’t want her to come but if I say no she’ll explode. I called her a few days ago and she said she’d visit Saturday. Later we got into a fight and she said she’d no longer be talking about me or to me. Yesterday I got a text saying she’d probably wouldn’t come Saturday she’d come another time with my older brother. I told her she’s welcome. Today I get a text saying if she comes she knows she can’t stay in my dorm but IF I’D STAY AT A HOTEL WITH HER and to be honest.

What the fuck. No absolutely not. Being around her alone now kinda makes me uncomfortable but THIS made me extremely uncomfortable. I know she’s trying to guilt me into staying with her but I just can’t do that. How do I respond to this?? She always tries to make me feel guilty and I always cave. How do you stand up for yourself in these situations?