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​Decided the old sunset poster was a bit too "waiting room at a dental clinic" for my taste, so I took matters into my own hands. My grandpa was a gunner in a B-26 Marauder over Germany, so I figured I’d pay tribute to that legacy by printing a B-26B1 Medium Bomber diagram.

​Naturally, instead of just buying a large print like a person with a functioning sense of time management, I printed it across 12 individual sheets of paper. Because why have one seamless image when you can have a giant 12-piece puzzle that reveals every tiny measurement error you’ve ever made?

​Once I realized the grid lines made it look like a high school geography project, I did what any rational adult would do: I attacked it with hazardous materials. To distract your eyes from the seams, I used:

​Motor Oil: Because nothing says "fine art" like 10W-30.

​Boiled Linseed Oil: For that authentic "this might spontaneously combust in my living room" smell.

​Shoe Polish: To add "depth," or as I like to call it, "smearing brown gunk until the seams stop mocking me."

​Actual Fire: Because if you can’t fix it, you might as well light it on fire.

​The result? It actually looks like a 70-year-old artifact recovered from a hangar fire. It’s "distressed." It’s "vintage." It’s definitely a liability to my homeowner's insurance.

​Grandpa probably would’ve laughed at the fact that I used motor oil and fire to make a paper plane look "right," but hey—at least it has more personality than a picture of a tree.

How to Overcomplicate Decorating (and Honor a War Hero)