Please get a reality check about bisexuality

Whether or not you like Julia, or think she brings up her sexuality too often, or like her intimacy week task, or think she uses too much woo woo bullshit language, or think her job sounds entirely made up (it’s me, the last one is my belief) can we **please stop deciding her “real” sexuality for her on the basis of her lack of chemistry with Grayson?**

I’m sure Grayson is great. I’m sure there are plenty of women who would like him. However he’s one man who was matched with Julia by reality tv producers. That’s not any sort of litmus test for a person’s sexual orientation, and it’s getting really ridiculous reading “she really wants a woman” “she’s a lesbian” over and over.

All we know is that Julia doesn’t have chemistry with Grayson. If you feel the need to declare her a lesbian over this, ask yourself why you’re so adamant that she needs to have chemistry with this one random dude in order to be a real, honest bisexual. I’m bisexual and also feel absolutely nothing for Grayson, yet I remain attracted to other men.

Being told “oh, so you were straight/ gay all along and you lied to me by pretending to be bisexual?” by a partner who things aren’t working out with is a pretty common experience for bisexuals. No one is the spokesperson for their entire gender, it’s egotistical as hell to think that for someone to be attracted to a whole gender they have to have chemistry with everyone of that gender. On one side of the coin the stereotype is that bisexuals are too slutty, and now, if we’re not sexually compatible with everyone we’re not real bisexuals? Okay.

The only think I think Julia is lying about is her job, which isn’t a real thing. However, bisexuality is real, and these repetitive comments about how she’s a lying, fake bisexual or a lesbian who doesn’t know it are just coming off as super biphobic and illogical.

Also, lesbians deserve to be free from lesbophobic stereotypes about how “all lesbians are a bit bisexual” or “all lesbians have to date men to figure it out”. Let women decide their own sexual identity actually.