Should I come clean

I’ve been struggling with untreated adhd since I was a kid. I am now 28 and my life is a mess. I am addicted to meth and smoke too much weed. I want to be sober and get my life back, but don’t know where to start.

I almost got arrested today and have made so many bad decisions over the years I am at my breaking point. I can’t hold down a job and my parents are aware of that. I’ve fucked up so many times in the past that I feel like I’m out of chances.

The only thing is my parents think my life is going great after a bunch of failed job attempts. That I didn’t get fired from my latest job that I actually loved. I don’t want to shatter the illusion and flip their life around just so I can get help. I feel like a giant burden/extremely selfish asking for help and admitting everything, but I can’t do this alone.

I can’t pay for rehab or anything and I also have a cat I can’t leave if I were to just decide to go on my own. On top of addiction the lying about everything is making it worse. I’ve just dug myself too deep I think.