How does one improve enthusiasm in sex?

I'm 20F, my boyfriend is 19M. We've been dating for 11 months.

I want to want to have sex. I want to feel passion.

It's frustrating. I don't have it, and it seems like literally everybody and everything around me has it. Like it comes naturally, and I'm so fucking envious.

Sex is supposed to be nice, no? Like you're attracted to this person and then the sex is hot or fun. Add love in the mix and boom, passion or some shit like that.

Love doesn't even have to be in the mix for some people. I'm a 20-year-old college student. I'm surrounded by horny fucks who like sex everywhere.

I have this issue where I connect the quality of sex with my self-worth. Like if I fail at sex, I'm a fucking failure. And I know it's not true, but man, do I feel pathetic every time the ideal that is imagined during sex doesn't play out like it should.

But tbh that feels like only half of the problem. That even without this issue, enthusiasm would still be a problem.

Once, when talking about what my boyfriend likes, he said this: "Enthusiasm is the best part of sex. It trumps skills. Sex is way better when you WANT to have it. Enthusiasm is kinda mandatory."

Which, for me, is weirdly one of the most disheartening things to possibly hear. Cause I don't fucking know how to have enthusiasm while literally everyone around me does.

My boyfriend has a stupid-high sex drive, and it can get overwhelming sometimes. Before me, he was in this friends-with-benefits thing with my friend. She got strongly emotionally attached, and he broke it off eventually. She had a high sex drive and a lot of enthusiasm, and every time I think about it I feel so fucking envious and inadequate.

I don't think I'm asexual, even if I do have a lower than average sex drive. But I don't have enthusiasm for sex....not any of it. Not for receiving or giving pleasure.

Not for foreplay.

Not for kinky or vanilla shit.

Not even the small things like kissing, seducing, or flirting.

Every time sexual exploration is done, it always goes south or is just unsatisfying. Sex is VERY fucking unsatisfying.

I just feel broken and tbh a little lonely when it comes to this because it really feels like I'm the only one around me that has this problem and I don't know what to fucking do.

I want passionate enthusiastic sex. It sounds fun and enjoyable. I crave the idea being desirable and desiring at the same time.

TL;DR: I don't know how to be enthusiastic about sex.