We've Upgraded Your EMR
INTERNAL MEMO
TO: All Clinical Staff
FROM: Information Technology & Digital Transformation Team
RE: Exciting EMR Upgrade — Go-Live Monday!
DATE: Thursday (3 business days before go-live)
Team,
We are THRILLED to announce that after 18 months of planning, 4 vendor demos, and a selection process that did not include a single clinician, your Electronic Medical Record system has been upgraded!
The new platform — PointClickPray™ 9.2 — does everything your old system did. It just does it differently. And with more clicks.
WHAT'S NEW
A completely redesigned interface!
Everything you've spent the last 3 years learning to find has been moved. The buttons are smaller. The menus are deeper. The search function now returns results from a different patient approximately 40% of the time.
Enhanced security features!
You will now be logged out after 90 seconds of inactivity. "Inactivity" includes reading your own note, reviewing a patient's history, and thinking.
Streamlined documentation!
Your daily note now requires only 47 clicks to complete. Highlights include:
- Navigate to therapy section (4 clicks — it's under Ancillary Services > Allied Health > Rehabilitation > Physical Therapy > Documentation > Notes > Daily)
- Select note type from a dropdown with 38 options, only 3 of which apply to you
- Goals are now on a separate screen that doesn't auto-save
- Sign and lock requires a confirmation popup, then another confirmation popup confirming the first confirmation popup
- Get logged out because signing took too long
TRAINING
A mandatory training webinar has been scheduled for Saturday at 6:30 AM. It will be led by a vendor representative named Kyle who has never worked in healthcare and will refer to patients as "end users."
Kyle will demonstrate the system using a sample patient with one diagnosis, one goal, and no complications — a scenario you will never encounter in your career.
SUPPORT
For the first two weeks, an IT support specialist will be stationed in the therapy gym. They will be identifiable by their lanyard and their visible discomfort around exercise equipment.
When you report a problem, they will ask if you've tried logging out and logging back in. When that doesn't work, they will escalate your ticket. You will receive an automated email confirming your ticket has been received. You will not receive a resolution.
Q: Will my templates carry over?
The templates you spent 2 years customizing have been migrated. However, the formatting is gone, the auto-populated fields now populate the wrong information, and your name has been replaced with "CLINICIAN, DEFAULT."
Q: Can I go back to the old system?
No. We announced its decommission in a 14-page PDF attached to an email with the subject line "Q3 Operational Updates — ACTION REQUIRED" that none of you opened.
A NOTE ON PRODUCTIVITY
Leadership has agreed to a 2-week grace period during which productivity expectations will remain exactly the same. After the grace period, expectations will also remain exactly the same.
If your productivity drops, please note that "learning a new EMR" is not an accepted reason on the performance improvement form. The accepted reasons are listed in Appendix C of the employee handbook, which is stored in the old EMR that no longer exists.
Thank you for your patience, your adaptability, and your willingness to attend a Saturday training without complaining where anyone in leadership can hear you.
Digitally yours,
Brenda Hutchins, PMP, CSSBB Director of Clinical Informatics & Digital Transformation "Innovation is a journey. Yours starts at the login screen."
^(This is satire. But if you just got an EMR upgrade and felt your eye twitch reading this — you're not alone. Technology should make clinical work easier, not harder.)
Posted Feb 18, 2026, 2:21 AM UTC