As a parent, what would you want in this situation?

I am a teacher (with a degree and all that) at a big academic co-op. It’s like an à la carte school basically and we have about 300 students. I say this to show that it’s more on the formal side as far as co-ops go. We meet with parents about their children’s progress, but that usually only happens if there are either significant behavior issues or the parent requests a meeting. My job is awesome and I love it, but I’m still transitioning to the co-op life. Culturally it’s very different than other teaching positions I’ve held over the years.

I have a student who appears to be very developmentally behind and who has some sort of physical disability that is worsening as she grows. (I don’t want to share identifying details.) As far as I know, her parents are doing nothing about either situation. I’ve met the parents several times and had long conversations with them about non-work stuff because we are part of the same community. They seem very kind, but some of their comments imply that not only are their daughter’s struggles totally normal for her age, but that she is more mature than most of her peers. This is so far from the truth that I was stunned. In a traditional school I would have asked for a parent conference and come prepared with the counselor and a packet of resources and evaluation wait lists so we could work as a team to address this. That doesn’t feel appropriate here though, partially because we don’t have those resources. One of my co teachers thinks we need to talk to mom and one thinks it’s not our place because she had to have noticed herself already.

As a homeschool parent, what do you think is the right approach? How have you seen homeschool groups handle these things in the past? She is such a sweet kid and I don’t want her to fall through the cracks.