It is quite tiredful

I hate seeing antis on tml because it triggers me... But at same time I can say my thoughts abt it cuz I don't want to lose my friends...

Yeah, I know I should just ignore but since I have ocd I keep feeling bad abt it and it makes me question my morality even though I KNOW how to separate fiction from reality

I try to tell myself "it is fine, what you like on fiction doesn't make you a bad person" but my OCD makes me tired

I personally don't ship stuffs I find 100% wrong cuz I feel uncomfortable even though I have friends who enjoy it and I respect their fictional taste

I don't like considering myself proship or anti cuz I really hate this kinda of fight but I often check on it to relief my OCD so I feel better with myself that I am not a bad person... But I am too scared

I want to write a manga that is not suitable for people who doesn't separate fiction from reality but I am scared that my friends or even my family hates me for it...

Maybe I should pick my friends better yeah, but I have such abandonment issues and it hurts me to break friendships...

Anyways, sorry if it is against the rules... I just feel really tired and I need to rant a bit...