Am I a real INTJ or am I just traumatized?

Hi everyone! F19 here

For the longest time, I was typed as ESFP or INFP. However, Its been about 2-3 years since I was typed as INTJ. I was thinking about how much I changed as a person over the years and I thought about “how could I go completely opposite from ESFP?”

I grew up in a domestic violence situation which destroyed my self esteem and image, and (not saying it correlated) I was a big time people pleaser. It was to a point where I would say yes to everything in fear of rejection. I would accept confessions from guys and agree to date just because I felt obligated to, or else I would be this horrible person. Bottom line, I was very emotionally driven AND immature. Making very irrational and irresponsible decisions because my heart felt like it. Financial, emotional, relationship, and personal decisions all came from the heart. I would block out all logical thinking.

Okay Im digressing. Back to the point. I feel like I finally found some sort of grounding even though Im still young. I think before I act now thankfully. I also have a very logical perspective on things now. Im a lot more secure in myself and I have no intention of getting married or having children because in my mind it is going to be more mentally taxing to be married and have kids than just doing my own thing and supporting myself. My people pleasing mindset is so immature to me now and I am not afraid to say no anymore. I still take into account peoples feelings and emotions when I speak to them because just because my thoughts and ideas I share are logical doesn’t mean I have to express it in a condescending manner. Is my heart traumatized or am I just thinking logically for myself? Is all my trauma catching up to me and my brain and body are in fight mode and I am just this incredibly avoidant person who accepted being alone to protect my feelings? Or am I growing as a person and Im learning self respect, self acceptance, and self love outside of my traumatic experiences? I have so much more to talk about that I cant type into coherent sentences but I guess this is the jist of it?

If anyone has had a similar story of being ESFP or more emotional then into INTJ let me know what you think!

If you are reading this and something doesnt seem clear Im happy to elaborate in the comments :) Most of the time my main posts arent fully there LOL