20Feb2026

I want to write this down before I forget: 

There was a boy, my Friend. 

We met at that awkward stage in life

Between 13 and 14 years old

And we ate lunch together 

And hung out intermittently 

(Maybe intimately?

Honestly I can’t remember because drugs.)

All the way through to senior year. 

When Inception betrayal led me to believe

That Friend preferred her over me,

That Shady C. 

But after Friend too broke up with the Bunch

(High school drama)

He asked me out to lunch. 

I was scared, but accepted

(Would I be betrayed again? 

Is this a set-up because she knew we were friends

Before all the drama caused a big rift?

*Panic attacks begin*).

Friend bought me ice cream and we walked the train tracks.

I said, why did you bring me here? 

He confessed he wanted to be a train engineer.

Friend said, “you were always kind to me”. 

And I can’t remember how I replied, 

Other than Goodbye. 

And that was the last time I ever saw him. 

A few (short) years later he took his own life. 

I heard a rumor they found him in the park. 

I cried and never sent flowers or went to the grave. 

I see that’s a pattern in my generation. 

Do graves even matter 

When anything we want to remember now lives forever

In the Cloud

And not in the ground?

Anyways, I loved you Friend

I just didn’t know it then.