Tinatambakan ako ng kamalasan.

You were about to turn 6 this March. Nagbibilang pa naman ako ng araw. Tapos bigla mo na lang akong iiwan. There were no signs para man lang masubukan kong patingin kita sa doctor. I swear I really wanted to give you the best life, but I was depressed and struggling to pick myself up. In the end, I was only able to offer you lambing, daily walks, a comfortable place to sleep in, and showers to keep you clean.

I am so angry at myself, kasi kung siguro dinadala kita sa vet for regular check-ups, gave you the most expensive food, supplements out there, and had the means to admit you to a 24-hour vet hospital in another city, baka andito ka pa. Galit na galit ako sa sarili ko. You deserved better, pero wala eh sa akin ka napadpad kasi it's either malupit o indifferent ang mga tao dito sa lugar natin sa mga katulad mo.

You were my biggest inspiration para sumubok araw-araw. Ikaw iyong pinakadahilan kung bakit gusto kong magkatrabaho kasi bibilhan sana kita ng mga mahal na treats at dalhin sa clinic for full body check-up para tumanda tayo together.

I tried my best, but I'm afraid this loss will haunt me forever. Kahit saang sulok ng bahay, naaalala kita; ikaw din ang sentro ng routine ko.

Sana hindi na ako gumising.