was it really that bad?

((major trigger warning))

i was about 17 years old and i had resorted to selling nudes of myself to pedophiles. i wanted to make enough money to leave where i was living at the time. i met up with this guy who i wanted to scam. i’d ask for half of the money before “sex” and the other after “sex” at the end of the day id be getting half the money because id obviously never go through with it. this time was a bit different, idk why i was so trusting to get into his car, but he was insanely rich. huge property/farm, his family rented out their horses to pro polo players in argentina. the first time i saw him nothing happened but he showed me where he lived and it was massive. the second time i made him promise me to give me half of the money for intercourse before it happened (which i had no intentions of legitimately going through with) so with that in mind i got in his car and his dog was there. i thought at the time nothing could go wrong because his dog was there right???? long story short he forced me to give him oral and all while so f*ngering me while his dog was licking my vagina. i’m not going to go into specifics of how it led up and all of the tiny details because i feel like it’ll trigger a flashback but i really need to know if this is even bad enough “trauma”

ofc there’s a plenitude of things that happened to me when i was younger, but at 17 i feel like id be old enough for it to not even be considered csa.

any advice, or just reassurance or really anything would be helpful.

im currently 21,

thank you