I don't know what to do anymore.

She broke up with me a couple months ago and I don't know what to do with my life. The reason why she broke up with me it's because she wanted a break from everything. I tried to make her stay but she wanted to leave, so respect her decision.

We made alot of promises together. Doing this and that. Most of it, she's the one making plans, i also agreed with her because yeah, i love her. Planning to have a daughter, where to live, etc.

We had arguments like normal couple, but this time it wasn't an argument or anything. She just felt empty. She is kind and sweet, she is talkative and very extrovert. She friendly towards male, which sometimes i find it bothering, especially when the person she messaging is toxic and playboy. I forgive her and move on everytime i ask her that topic.

Slowly i realized she is losing feeling, everytime ae hangout, or talk, i can see that she's losing feeling. But i try my best to do anything, buying her plushies, hangout with her, help her, hold her. But still, that happened

I don't know what to do. I'm not sad till I'm suicidal, or sad till lose motivation to live. I just, felt blank. I try to focus on myself, going to the gym and study. But i felt like I'm missing something, purpose maybe?.

I blame myself everyday, thinking I'm overprotective or I'm just a terrible boyfriend. When she's gone, i didn't search for other girl.i just can't, i dont know why.

She's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, and I'm just a basic person. I went to the gym because i felt ugly, i hate myself that i always blame everything about myself. I don't talk to other people about this because i dont like sharing my problem to real people.