How do I move on from fumbling the best girlfriend I ever had?

The breakup happened several months ago, in the summer. She was my best friend. My soulmate. When we first met, we were talking to each other as if we already knew each other.

We’d watch Star Wars together, we’d go to the theatre because we both loved the theatre, we’d try new foods because we loved trying new foods and treats and restaurants. She was serious about being childfree—she got the surgeries. We looked into adopting a pet. We just didn’t know what yet.

The breakup was so abrupt. One day, on a typical after-work date, she told me that she couldn’t do it anymore. I was confused. I showered her in love. I was there for her whenever she needed me.

I asked her what I did wrong. What I messed up on. What I can improve upon. Because what I felt like I did is fixable.

She told me that there was absolutely nothing wrong with me. That I was the best boyfriend she ever had, and she needed time to heal from a previous relationship she had before me. She said she wanted to get rid of the feelings she had for me.

I stopped eating. I tried dating again but everyone wants kids. I bought the premium and gave curated messages to every single woman who was childfree/did not want kids, and the matched i got with were ghosted. I deleted it.

Starting traveling. But I feel so empty while doing it. There’s no fun in it anymore.

It felt there was nothing I could do. Like the breakup had to happen but I don’t know why.