How to find a lavender relationship? Where should I find dl men?

I (23F) recently came to the conclusion that I am a gay, with limited to no attraction to men but I have little to no experience with the same sex. I really want to experience being in a relationship with a woman but due to family it's not possible. I understand that I have to eventually let go of family expectations and live for myself, but I'm just not ready yet.

I want a lavender relationship where me and the guy are friends and cover for each other. I've thought about making a Grindr account but that seems disrespectful. I can't go to a gay club yet because my location is tracked so they'd know.

My question is, how do I find someone who's interested in the same thing? How do I find men that are in the closet/want a lavender relationship? I don't really want a lecture on how I shouldn't appeal to my parents if they don't accept me, I will get there eventually but I really just want to experience love without the stress of everything crashing down just yet.