Is this a normal thing?

Hello, I’m here because I’m not a meditation person. However, I might have been my whole life. Since I my early teens whenever I was stressed about something I imagined myself in a white room with no doors or windows. Sitting crisscrossed in the middle. Whenever a thought comes into my mind I breathe in and breathe out and the thought would be gone until it was all just white. I know that is not the purpose of meditation but it’s just something I’ve always done. I usually make myself do it before big events that cause me anxiety. But the thoughts that come up are never about the event that is about to happen. It is usually stuff from the past that is minuscule and didn’t ever stress me out. Someone told me this is disassociating however right after I’m able to lock in and go into a sort of flow state and accomplish the event with no fear or worries and I usually accomplish the event in a stellar fashion. Is this something that you guys have had experience with or do often?