so according to this chart of mine and researches, i know that some aspects of them describing me were true but some of them i feel like might be an over exaggeration and i was wondering if that might be just a spectrum i sit on and it’s just not that bad for me comparing to people of the same placements or if i’m just confused with my birth that could have made the whole chart wrong? 

1. weirdly enough, with leo rising, i do not feel like i had a rough childhood with my mom? of course i went through phases where i really really resent my mom and question everything about her (bad of me). but at the same time, while growing up, i did have a great time with her and she was one of my best friends. definitely were some physical and psychological abuses but i think she did them unintentionally in which i cant really blame her for this and she did try her best to provide me with a lot of things i’d ask for. 

2. there was indication of moon-pluto conjunction that is it could lead to possible addictions, self-sabotaging mechanisms. but i think i have rather extreme addiction then none at the same time. it’s either i’d abuse substances and then go weeks/months without touching them again. it’s rather conditional for me.  i would say my self-sabotage lie more within my relationships, either with partners or friends or family members. 

3. neptune in 6th with chaos in routines. i’m actually surprise to know people have certain sleeping and waking time and eating time. one thing i don’t know how is that when i was living with my parents, i actually have a pretty good habits and structures, but when i started moving out, things changed completely and as if i have never learnt to do an actual habit ever before in my life. plus, i think the whole concept of calendar is very disturbing. either i have to follow every single thing i listed out, or i hate following them and proceed to not follow any at all because i feel contained (could be related to the sag moon?). 

4. how do i deal with so few earth placements? 😩 i am actually very frustrated over the fact that i’m rather easily-influenced and not being able to understand myself as much as other people do. i feel like i’m copying people around me most of the time and since i blend in well, i have a lot of connections and friends but i’ve never met anyone who actually see me or understand me. even people who claim to have good senses and everything, i always feel like they’re lying because i do have a good intuitive reading of people but i can never understand myself and know who i am which is exhausting. 

5. i have always chosen my partners with criteria like they’re nice, they’re put together, they’re caring to other people around them, and they’re woke (or at least as aware as i am). funny enough, they always ended up being people who are extremely demanding in emotions. i get that they might feel insecure over small to big things, but being in relationship with them always feel like walking on eggshells and i’m extremely sensitive to what they say and what they do and they are also that way towards me. (my exes have virgo moon, cancer moon, and scorpio moon, in that order.) so i don’t know how to shut off or tune down this sensitive system and learn to live a little more chill and at ease and not so prone to people’s behaviors or find someone who will actually help me regulate rather than triggering it:) 

chart’s questions & asking for any other inputs i should know of? or if there’s any question i can also try to answer - i’m also studying 🤓