me (31M) and my long distance partner (23F) are having our first issue. She's calling me insecure. How do we fix this?

So, its safe to say our 3 month honeymoon just ran into our first issue. Some notes - I met her on instagram and we hit it off great. We had things in common, we developed mutual feelings and started flirting.

Another note - one night early one I was really in love with her, so I asked her to be my girlfriend. She kindly said no, to just continue talking and until we meet in person. We plan to meet in the summer. Me visiting her.

It was going great until more recently i felt like her energy was winding down. Messaging less, liking my replies less. Until the other night she didn't say goodnight. And that really triggered me. Cause we had been saying goodnight every night.

So I was being weird and asked "are we okay?" and she confirmed that we're okay but started asking more and more why i felt the way that i felt until i finally told her. Cause she didnt say goodnight. And that seemed to really turn her off. I tried yes, changing topic. Keeping the conversation moving and to let her know I'm okay. Im not trying to make this an issue and she asks "why are you changing topic?"

Today, her energy was more off and i couldnt help myself but ask "what can i do to be better?" and she said "just so you know, i don't like insecure men. Especially men who are insecure with themselves".

So like damn, I try moving on. Get accused of changing topic. And yeah, I have a past that makes me feel insecure and i get called out by it. I don't know what to do to fix this.

In my past, the girls sucked at communicating and didn't want to solve our issues. And with her, I thought she wanted to but she calls me insecure for struggling with any doubt i may have. Reassurance is a thing, right?