My wife thinks I’m overly obsessed and have no joy, I don’t know what to do.

Pretty much what the title says. We are 8 months into trying (with a donor sperm, wife and I are women, I’m carrying), and haven’t ever had a positive. My wife said today (after I talked about starting with a fertility clinic) that she thinks I’m obsessed and have no joy and it’s ruining our relationship. She wants this process to be happier and exciting and she has a positive attitude of it will happen when it happens and I have a fear that something is wrong. I just don’t know where to go from here - I have a therapist already. Today is cycle day 1 we had this convo after our second failed IUI with our OBGYN. Anyone else been here? What did you do?