i know i shouldnt compare

for me my cptsd is linked to my parents and i know im codependent to them to some extent. but im not constantly afriad of them, i do genuinely love them just not stuff they do that does trigger anxiety and fear in me, i want to keep them in my life i want them to be there for me because i know i love them and they love me. its just reading on this sub can make it feel like im not as bad or im in a better state than most because i dont get flash backs that overwhelm me or dpdr like most. i was never abused, and rarely shouted at but i know i would dissociate away into anything i could on the internet or on tv and that ive been doing that for a long time just going in and out of those fake world into the real one