How to stop being ashamed of being trans due to severe trauma?

I came out very early. About 6 years old, and it ruined my relationship with my entire family, and everyone around me over time. I was often beat senseless growing up because I was androgynous appearing (as many kids are), and that furthered the abuse with me being vocal about being a boy. I grew up in a very, very religious household. I was told things everyday like "God doesn't make mistakes, this identity you're making up is an insult to God" "God doesn't love you unless you're cis", things like that. Besides my family doing this, any friends I tried making were void. Kids' parents would tell me that "We don't want our children exposed to your illness" "There's something terribly wrong with you.." when I would try to come over and hang out. Kids would record me in bathrooms at school to the point where I couldn't use the restrooms or locker rooms, I'd get hit or have food thrown at me in hallways. I've had guns pulled on me, chased with baseball bats, been punched and kicked, a little bit of everything for being unfortunately visibly queer as a teenager into my adult years. My first relationship was also me being fetishized for being trans, and once I got surgery he too became physically and sexually abusive.

I'm 24 now, just 2 years ago got out of being in a constant abusive, manipulative environment of any kind. I'm very ashamed of my identity even after being freed of these situations I was surrounded by. It's a constant, daily thing that I feel worthless because I'm trans. I'm constantly paranoid that I'm unlovable because of it, or that everyone can tell I'm trans when I go to work or outside. How would I even remotely process this kind of trauma? I try talking nice to myself, shaking off the bad thoughts. It's so hard. It doesn't feel right.