I've been considering ending everything

I know that sounds dramatic and I promise I most likely won't but let me give some context

I'm a 17 year old trans guy I don't have many friends just three

Two irl and one online

Awhile ago I had a falling out with my best friend of 10 years because they sexually assaulted me and had me do explicit things

I told my current best friend and we both cut them out of our lives

Then I got with this one person and we dated for a year but a week ago they dumped me

They mentally abused me and I didn't realize till I told my online friend who my ex cut out of the group

They had me be around them 24/7 didn't let me around my friends unless they were there and pushed me when it came to sexual things

They would send me inappropriate images and messages even when I asked them to slow down because I had trauma regarding this

They have just blocked me Wich is fine I don't really wanna talk to them again

It makes me feel gross and disgusting

Every person I trust in that way just uses me for my body and it's disgusting

I learned my irl best friend had been hanging out with not only my ex but also my sexual assaulter and when I tried to ask her about it she said it didnt effect her

I'm always here for people I'm always trying to be supportive and open at all times I always try to give my 100% and be the best person I can around my friends. Whenever they need me at any point at any time I'm willing to drive and get them. I picked my friend up at 2 in the morning one time. But it feels like no one even cares about me

I mean so little to everyone in around and those who tell me that I do mean something to them end up just using me for their own disgusting pleasure

I'm sorry for the rant here but I have nowhere else to turn to and can't tell anyone else