Social trauma and loneliness seems to always get the better of me

Maybe I'm just tired or its one of those late night thoughts, but I noticed I always found myself wanting connection from others and then overthinking, eventually withdrawing. Even when I'm getting a good feeling from others, I keep thinking about how they might feel or think and because of that, I feel I can never really truly be myself. Not to make it sound like a villain's backstory or anything, but I've always been a social outcast as a kid. I never really knew how to fit in but at least back then, I thought differently about others' opinions. I know that maybe this stems from a fear of getting hurt or feeling vulnerable in social connections as I grew older, but I keep noticing it and I don't really know the way around it.

I feel like I've rambled enough. I want to know if other INFPs went through the same thing and if you guys might have some suggestions.