Wanting to quit my responsibilities

I’m really struggling more than I have in the past

My sleeping schedule has become erratic, and im feeling extremely numb, it’s the first time I’ve said to myself I feel like a burden,

I don’t know what level that is in depression or mentality, but I just feel heavy mentally all the time

I’m a wedding singer, and soon will be doing 30+ shows all over the country (uk) I have a band that i manage, I’m the sole driver and make all the arrangements with clients/ hotels ect,

I’m absolutely dreading the year ahead, I want to contact my agency and tell them I can’t do it, I’m getting married this year, all I can think about is the work,

I just want to love my wife and be mentally stable

Im trying to be strong and keep my head in the game, I say to myself others have to deal with so much more, and the job I do is easy in comparison But I just feel like im in water and its about to go over my nose,

Does anyone have any experience? Or any tips with coping ?, im training Jujitzu 5-6 times a week or as much as my body can take, and im looking to go back on anti depressants (fluoxetine)