We broke up, he got a new girl, then asked me to marry him anyway…

Hi. If you’ve ever loved someone who couldn’t decide between you and another woman… this story might hit home to some

I was in a long-distance relationship for about seven to eight months in 2025, but we had been friends for two years before that. He wasn’t just a boyfriend he was my close friend first. He was loving, supportive, caring…words of affirmation was part of him which but also demanding and controlling. And some nights were YOH absolute nightmares. We argued constantly. Every disagreement somehow became my fault that felt toxic. He had this way of twisting things that made me question my own feelings, and he’d accuse me of having a big ego whenever I stood my ground.

In December 2025, he broke up with me.

It shattered me. I cried through sleepless nights, replaying everything in my head with things he said especially when he said "This is the hardest thing I've ever had to go through it's as if I'm mourning the death of somebody who is still alive, my love spoiled him, became rotten and made him sick saying he doesn't think we're compatible" I was left wondering how love could turn into silence so fast. Then Christmas Eve came, and he texted me to wish me well. That message confused me more than it comforted me. After all the pain, why come back just to say Merry Christmas? But when New Year’s Eve arrived, I returned the favor and wished him too. It felt polite… but also unfinished.

By mid-January 2026, he reached out again and told me he’d be coming to my city. That’s when things started to feel strange. He admitted he was already in a new relationship. He said he wanted me to hear it from him, not from someone else i told him I knew cause I saw signs you posting her. Not gonna lie my friends had warned me about him before, said he was manipulative, but hearing about the new girl still hit me in the chest.

When he arrived, he called and asked if we could meet. I agreed. He picked me up and drove me to his apartment. The whole time he kept asking, “Are you okay?” I wanted to laugh. And said how could I be okay knowing you moved on so quickly after we broke up? He...He told me the new girl wasn’t planned. She just appeared, and he “fell into it.” explained that he wasn’t looking for love, but this girl slid into his DMs blah blah blahh and things just “happened.” and you expect me to believe that liessss then he looked me in the eyes and said, “I still love you... I really like you.”

I didn’t know what to say, so I just smirked and said, “Mm-hmm, okay.”

Then he asked if it was possible to have two girlfriends.

I thought he was joking. He wasn’t. I just laughed

I told him part of me hated him for what happened, but another part still loved him. He suggested we stay friends. I told him being friends would be risky, but I’d try. Before we could even process that conversation, his new girlfriend called. She had flown in to visit him for a week. He answered on speaker, talked to her right in front of me, then hung up and asked, “Did you hear her?”

Of course I heard her. I just didn’t understand what he wanted from me in that moment, did he expect me to breakdown my emotions. The night ended him dropped me off home.

A few days later, he contacted me again. He needed a favor asked me to drop off one of his deliveries. I did. It got late, and I ended up spending the night at his place. On Valentine’s Day, we made love. The following week, he picked me up at my place. We went out, explored different places, had this adventurous couple of days… and I stayed with him for two nights and we slept together again.

A couple of days by:

Something happened I never expected.

He got down on one knee and proposed.

No ring. No warning. Just him looking up at me, asking me to marry him. I laughed in shock because it felt unreal. I asked if he was serious. He said yes. I reminded him he had a girlfriend. He stood up and said, “If you say yes, I don’t need her.” your the one I only want!

That sentence still echoes in my head, that's when I realized I wasn’t standing inside a love story.

I was standing inside someone else’s indecision.

The following days:

I met him again cause I texted saying "I know you hungry be ready in 7 I'll be there to pick up" I texted asked if he was joking he said no, by 7 he was outside waiting I got dressed casual since it was cold I decided to be hooded up with baggy jeans stepped outside as he also he stepped outside the car he was dressed up Damnn I was shocked, gave him a compliment "looking good' he thanked me but looked at me and he said 'what in the world are you wearing'. I told him it's raining and cold what don't you see, he opened the door me I sat as he still looked at me as we started off the journey he looks again and says can we make a Uturn back and you get changed cause I don't like what you wearing I asked him what's the occasion cause you told me to get ready and here I am ready not naked. He said I'm planning to take you on a fancy date but now looks like gonna have to change to a casual one. His mood shifted and said can you change!? I said I ain't gonna change since you didn't tell me the occasion was about... no hints or nothing he kept quiet and drove to a pizza place, everytime his eyes are on me he says I'm not happy what you did today but what can I do, it's all your choice as we sat down and order he starts pacing here and there. I tell him to relax what's wrong we just got here he chills abit and he take a ring his wearing and he says WILL YOU MARRY ME, I said the bigger the unfitted ring, the bigger the NO and said your ring doesn't fit me you know that for sure cause you keeping messing with me each time in serious moments he says I wanted to a carat ring but I know you'll say no I just looked at him as I was holding back for my intrusive answer, foods comes we ate chatted here and there silly vibes and headed to the car opens the door for me and start the journey he asks where do you wanna go, I said home he nods and says okay, on the way I ask him can I ask you a question, I know I'll always be a boring girl to you but who do you mostly love between me and your girl? He looks at me and says wooow that's a good question though I wish we were that close to answer your question I said is you and your girl that close as you say if I was you and I aren't? He says she wants us to be close she got more money than i which doesn't she need any help or anything from me, I nod and said neither I never wanted nor needed your money, he looks at me and says can we stop talking about this and just enjoy the moment I said okay, stop by the supermarket I wanna buy something I stepped as he steps out too I grab few things as he calls me and says don't pay I'll pay then I said why you far he says their too many girls upfront come take my phone I went to him and said are you worried that you dressed up he says no they are just eyeing on me, I look at him and say noo there must be someone you know that you hiding from he says no then If so go and pay or I'll pay he goes and pay as we head out he uses another path to exist, I see him and say now that's something you would do to hide from someone he says no there are just too many girls I reply WHO CARES WHEN YOUR MINDING YOUR OWN BUSINESS as we head to the car I tell him to open, this time I open the door myself as he comes pacing I tell him since you are hiding from someone take me home or I'll walk home cause the supermarket to my place is a 7min walk he says you can't do that cause I won't let you, I told him try me and I'll leave, he starts off and we reach home he looks at me and says I love you I reply love you too. He says are you playing with me I respond look a lot has happened today let's call it a night.

The real reason we broke up was timing. He’s in his late twenties and wants a wife and a baby ASAP. His new girlfriend is slightly older and she wants the same fast future. I’m in my mid-twenties approaching late and I believe in taking things slow.

When we were together, I was willing to risk everything because I loved him and I still do love him. But i decided I can’t rush my life just to keep someone. Cause love shouldn’t feel like being drafted into a race you never agreed to run.

Now he has the future he claimed he wanted, yet he’s still questioning whether he’s ready with her yet he’s still looking back at me. And somehow, I’m still standing in the middle of that confusion.

I don’t know if this is love, manipulation, fear of being alone which I 100% don't mind being alone, but all three mixed together. I just know it hurts. I know I’m caught between the version of him I loved and the reality of the man he is right now. Cause sometimes the hardest heartbreak isn’t losing someone…

It’s realizing they were never ready to hold you in the first place or allowing to let go of the person you love and I’m trying to figure out how to walk away without losing the part of myself that still cares

What’s stressing me right now is that my period is late, and I’m just hoping it goes back to normal because it feels like a ticking time bomb.