Friend issues

I have been having some issues with what I thought was my best friend. I really urgently need someone nowadays to help me stay sane and we talked every day basically, about anything. Always had.

In the past, there had been occasions like him belittling my problems, delibarately ignoring some individual text messages and saying things that made me feel like he doesn't care about me at all - but, I shoved them all aside in my mind.

Recently, we had an argument and he just wouldn't understand my standpoint and told me to never bring it up again and? I apologized.

The above mentioned occasions had been doubling up since then and I finally brought it up a few days ago, that I feel like I'm losing him and that it hurts feeling like he doesn't care about me and brought up examples, though I do my best to tell him all the time how much he means to me. He said he ignored my messages because... he changed the topic and started talking about the argument he forbid me to ever bring up again. He felt like he wasn’t doing anything to help me like I wouldn't care about him and allegedly smashed every good word the second it came out of his mouth. I got only more headaches out of this conversations and guess what happened in the end? Correct. I apologized.

Yesterday he again just ignored only some messages delibarately where I just wanted to talk about stuff, that I deleted afterwards. I only reply to his updates throughout his day and don't say anything else. He asked about my plans yesterday, I answered, he didnt. I deleted it, out of sight out of mind. Today, he asked me the same and I said "dunno, I'll see" and he was "alright :)". What good does it bring me just talking about the god forsaken fkn weather with him?? If I wanted smalltalk I'd go to the hairdresser.

I REALLY need help and support right now. My psychiatrist kicked me out and now my "best friend" of 15-something years just decided to not having it. He also ignored OVER AGAIN my message about how I didn't want to lose him. His answer? I just didn't want to reply to that anymore. Like yeah. Whatever. I don't care anymore. I have a hundred other friends just outside this door. Not. He should have known already, like friends know stuff about friends? that I love and need words of affirmation every now and then but I could turn old and grey waiting for him to say it.

I've always been there for him no matter what and over and over again and then him saying to me that I'm "sometimes difficult but it's not always bad!" Like, thanks, should that comfort me? He also wasn't the easiest person to work with and console but I didn't care because I cared about him. Apparently, now that's what I'm worth to him now. No, no, no worries, my suicidal thought are not taking any physical shape after this? NoOOoooo.

I also addressed that I felt like he replaced me with his stupid ai bot chats and he said no and told me that it's just a game! You know what actually? I asked him like in a roundabout way about what this ai shit is like to him, that maybe he sees it like a game or what else should I see it like AND HE SAID NO. Gaslighting? Seriously?