Falling behind everyone in my life, how do I catch up

Everyone around me is progressing with their lives:

- My friends are getting girlfriends and making advancements into their desired careers.

- My sister is succeeding as a musician and playing with semi-big artists.

- My brother is taking up jobs to become a movie editor.

Meanwhile I dropped out of highschool to go into film school under my parents' advice that I don't waste my time in highschool, only to realise that it's not for me. Most of my friends don't really keep in contact with me, and the only ones that do have conflicting schedules with mine - which makes it very difficult to even hang out. The only time we do hang out is only Fridays to do bouldering, and because time is short I cherish every second.

My only job is part time as a janitor on Mondays and Tuesdays, 6pm-10pm. My TAFE (Australian tertiary education) schedule goes from Monday-Thursday from 9:30-4pm, which conflicts with my friends in highschool and their jobs.

Bouldering is the only real in person socialisation I get. My TAFE classmates are cool people, but not my type of people - I feel like a pickle on a burger with them: I'm never really wanted, I'm kinda just there. This on top of my disinterest in what we're doing, I feel like the $4k I'm paying and the 1 year I'm spending there isn't worth it.
I could return back to highschool, but because I left before I finished year 11 last year, I'd have to repeat it, and not be with my friends.

Although I want to become a voice actor: I have no real drive or desire to do anything or accomplish anything, which annoys my parents. I've made a demo reel, and I'm always looking for work online, but nothing ever comes up, and so all my parents see is their 17 year old failure sitting in his room on his computer all day.

I've had constant struggles with my mental health during highschool, and ever since I dropped out it's only gotten worse. I go to the gym, write novels and do miniature painting to try and deal with it, but the silence and loneliness of the environment isn't a big enough distraction for me.

It's extremely hard for me to open up to my family, my parents especially about my personal life, to the point that I don't feel like I can tell them that I was r*ped by my first gf. I try to open up to my friends, but their lives seem to be going well and I don't want to bring them down with me - rather, I want to bring myself to their level and move forward in life alongside them.

I wish I had the motivation to achieve things in life, and I wish that I had at least someone to crush on. But I have neither, and I have no clue on how to achieve either. Sometimes I feel like life isn't worth it, but I hang onto the hope that things will eventually turn around. And I feel like I don't deserve any attention or sympathy because there are definitely people out there in the world who deserve it more than me.

I guess this turned into a vent, sorry for that.

I truly don't know what to do.