Do you think that maybe one day someone will love me and choose me?

been drinking a bit more lately. I have abandonment and daddy issues lmao.... idk I tend to over give and love too much and I tend to believe those who tell me they love me and will never leave. I'm sure they mean it in the moment but when they're finally over me it feels very sudden and overnight. recently I had the worst heartbreak of my life. so much so that I decided I needed therapy, but now I feel my walls are built so high I can't believe anyone who is nice to me.

oh and a relative just sent me a pic of my dad's burial site today. he was abusive towards me so idk how I feel. I sent him a 👍 response idk dude idk I'm lost I'm so fucking miserable idk what to do or think or feel I'm just lost aha