Help im fucked

So Ive always had Agoraphobia since i was like 10, due to my severe anxiety and panic disorder and ocd.

I’m 17 Ive been housebound with agoraphobia for 5 months now all because of an Adverse Reaction to Fluoxetine, triggered my OCD fear of Schizophrenia/psychosis theme for months, this is 2/10 now my OCD has latched onto existence i cant leave the house or be alive because i dont feel safe to be alive i dont know why im alive or why people are alive its not just an intrusive thought its my entire perception of reality my only thought 24/7 about anything and everything i cant look at people without more and more thoughts of why going out and getting in the car i think how what this is so weird then my DPDR kicks in. I couldn’t go to sixth form and went through a mental breakdown seriously- im stuck now No Job No ‘Life’, and a constant brain that will not let me rest im absolutely petrified i will be homeless and have no life im suicidal and i want my life back but its eating me alive that i physically cannot get on a 50 minute bus to sixth form everyday its not enjoyable its traumatic so traumatic and scary but being at home means my mind sees 5 years as tomorrow it sees no life and no point i get worse my ocd ruminates more and more and more life feels impossible it feel like everyone just accepts it but why is it so painful i have so much pressure on myself to do sixth form im so scared of why this is me i dont think i can do life it feels like impossible how will i ever drive how will i ever ever have a life its not just college its friends its people my age its a social life its a bridge to uni its what i wanted my mind ripes everything from me but i dont feel safe to be me and to be going alone to sixth form that feels like going into a cage with tigers its just not worth it but what now being at home i have no purpose all i have is worse and worse and more depression i cant do this its so too much but its only me that can do it physically i hate this